Friday, November 2, 2012

LMAYQ: How to do things

Time to get back to Answering Your Questions.  It has been a whole month, and I have had some great search engine queries lead to The Cellular Scale. As always, I am pretty sure whoever asked The Internet these questions did not find an answer on this blog. Since I hate to disappoint, here are some real answers to some real questions:

1. "How to make a football out of construction paper"

 I did write about how bipolar neurons look like footballs, but never explained how to make a football yourself. You take a piece of construction paper or notebook paper and fold as diagrammed in the following image.

How to make a paper football, from A Crisp Fold
Then you hold it between two fingers and flick it with your other hand, trying to get it between some arbitrary goal posts, or to the back of your classmate's head.

2. "How to beat Mass Effect without Shepard dying."

1. You have to have the majority of the 'War Assets'
2. You have to choose "destroy the reapers" at the very end.

But it's not like Shepard gets up and walks around or anything, you just get to see an N7 chest plate take a single tantalizing gasp.

3. "How to draw a Pokemon character."

I put one little picture of one little Pokemon character in a post about how the Axolotl nose can help us understand how the brain modulates odor receptors. And boy, people must search for "pokemon" on a lot. Some unlucky kid found an article about smell when what she really wanted to learn was:

 how to draw Psyduck (source)
Well, there you go, now you can draw the vacant-staring psychic platypus-duck from Pokemon. Here's a little more about Psyduck:
Psyduck is constantly stunned by its headache. It usually stands immobile, with a vacant expression, trying to calm its headache. However, when its headache becomes too severe, it releases tension in the form of strong psychic powers. (from Bulbapedia)
For the record, I do not endorse the scientific validity of the Bulbapedia website.

4. "How to kill a small man."

Hmmm. This is a tough one. How small is this man? If he is very very small, you could put him in a tupperware container without poking air holes. If he is a little bigger, you could probably stuff him in the refrigerator. That's fatal, right?

I suppose I am glad you did not find an answer to this particular question at The Cellular Scale.

© TheCellularScale

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